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Letters

Barack Obama’s Letter to Donald Trump

Barack Obama’s Letter to Donald Trump January 20, 2016 Dear Mr. President – Congratulations on a remarkable run. Millions have placed their hopes in you, and all of us, regardless of party, should hope for expanded prosperity and security during your tenure. This is a unique office, without a clear blueprint for success, so I […]

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Conan O’Brien, Regarding the Changes in The Tonight Show

Conan O’Brien’s press release regarding the Changes in The Tonight ShowJanuary 12, 2010People of Earth:In the last few days, I’ve been getting a lot of sympathy calls, and I want to start by making it clear that no one should waste a second feeling sorry for me. For 17 years, I’ve been getting paid to

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George W. Bush’s Letter to Barack Obama

George W. Bush’s Letter to Barack Obama January 20, 2009 Dear Barack, Congratulations on becoming our President. You have just begun a fantastic chapter in your life. Very few have had the honor of knowing the responsibility you now feel. Very few know the excitement of the moment and the challenges you will face. There

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Founder of Pastafarianism, Bobby Henderson’s Letter to Kansas School Board

Bobby Henderson’s (founder of Pastafarianism) Open Letter to Kansas School Board May, 2005 I am writing you with much concern after having read of your hearing to decide whether the alternative theory of Intelligent Design should be taught along with the theory of Evolution. I think we can all agree that it is important for

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Johnny Cash’s Love Letter to his wife, June Carter Cash

Johnny Cash’s Love Letter to his wife, June Carter CashJune 23, 1994Happy Birthday Princess, We get old and get use to each other. We think alike. We read each others minds. We know what the other wants without asking. Sometimes we irritate each other a little bit. Maybe sometimes take each other for granted. But

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Sid Vicious’ List of his girlfriend Nancy Spungen’s Best Attributes

Sid Vicious’ List of his girlfriend Nancy Spungen’s Best Attributes: ~1978 What Makes Nancy So Great By Sidney 1 Beautiful 2 Sexy 3 Beautiful figure 4 Great sense of humour 5 Makes extremely interesting conversation 6 Witty 7 Has beautiful eyes 8 Has fab taste in clothes 9 Has the most beautiful wet pussy in

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W.E.B. Du Bois’ Letter to his 14 year old Daughter, Yolande

W.E.B. Du Bois’ letter to his 14 year old daughter, Yolande, as she went off to England for schoolOctober 29, 1914Dear Little Daughter:I have waited for you to get well settled before writing. By this time I hope some of the strangeness has worn off and that my little girl is working hard and regularly.Of

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Samuel L. Clemen’s Notice for his Next Burglar

Samuel L. Clemen’s notice for his next burglarSeptember 9, 1908NOTICE.To the next Burglar.There is nothing but plated ware in this house, now and henceforth. You will find it in that brass thing in the dining-room over in the corner by the basket of kittens. If you want the basket, put the kittens in the brass

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A Letter to Mark Twain Regarding Tom Sawyer and Huck Finn

Asa Don Dickinson’s Letter to Mark Twain regarding taking the Tom Sawyer and Huck Finn books out of a children’s libraryNovember 19, 1905DEAR SIR:I happened to be present the other day at a meeting of the children’s librarians of the Brooklyn Public Library. In the course of the meeting it was stated that copies of

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George Bernard Shaw’s Review of a Woman at a Don Giovanni Performance

George Bernard Shaw’s Review of a woman at a Don Giovanni performance to the London TimesJuly 3, 1905Sir,The Opera management of Covent Garden regulates the dress of its male patrons. When is it going to do the same to the women?On Saturday night I went to the Opera. I wore the costume imposed on me

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Fraterville, Tennessee Mine Disaster Victim Jacob Vowell’s Farewell Letter

Fraterville, Tennessee Mine Disaster Victim Jacob Vowell’s farewell letter to his wife, Sarah Ellen VowellHis son, Elbert died with him.May 19, 1902Ellen, darling, goodbye for us both. Elbert said the Lord has saved him. We are all praying for air to support us, but it is getting so bad without any air.Ellen I want you

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Love Letter from Samuel Clemens to Olivia Clemens

Love Letter from Samuel L. Clemens to Olivia ClemensNovember 27, 1875Livy darling,Six years have gone by since I made my first great success in life and won you, and thirty years have passed since Providence made preparation for that happy success by sending you into the world.Every day we live together adds to the security

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Abraham Lincoln’s Letter to the King of Siam RE: Elephants

Abraham Lincoln’s Letter to the King of Siam, declining the offer of Elephants to help with the civil war.February 3, 1862Abraham Lincoln,President of the United States of America.To His Majesty Somdetch Phra Paramendr Maha Mongut,King of Siam,Great and Good Friend:I have received Your Majesty’s two letters of the date of February 14th., 1861.I have also

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Charles Lamb’s Letter to Bernard Barton, Regarding his (common) Cold

Charles Lamb’s letter to Bernard Barton, regarding his cold January 9th, 1824 Dear B.B.- Do you know what it is to succumb under an insurmountable day-mare,- “a whoreson lethargy,” Falstaff calls it, -an indisposition to do anything, or to be anything, -a total deadness and distaste,-a suspension of vitality, -an indifference to locality,- a numb,

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Benjamin Franklin’s Letter to William Strahan

Benjamin Franklin’s Letter to William StrahanJuly 5, 1775Mr. StrahanYou are a Member of Parliament, and one of that Majority which has doomed my Country to Destruction. You have begun to burn our Towns and murder our People. — Look upon your hands! They are stained with the Blood of your Relations! — You and I

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